V Moody v moody

V moody and Very moody de 心情来了。。。生活是这种态度。。。

我无法让我的态度亮给人家看。。。因为心里一直隐藏一种不能突出自己的模样。。。

我还是会觉得我很自卑。。。不但年纪大过别人还什么都不会。。。然后我就会一直埋怨如果我不拿degree现在的生活也许会过得更好。。。因为我本来就不是读书的料。。。

看看我的缺点：。。。 MUET Band 1… 英文烂！。。。 马来语okay okay。。。 华语一流（其实也不是啦，碰到那些整天用那种文言文讲话的人就想打他们了）。。。语言啊~。。。 我就是马马虎虎咯~。。。。人际。。。我没什么要去参他们。。。I am always a lone ranger since I entered University…. 虽然华人朋友多。。。but 我不会要去参。。。因为他们有时讲说sibeh让你不爽！就是他会酸你酸到够够！我他妈的我已经忍无可忍了！！ 他们就是那么的神不但成绩赢人说话厉害。。。but差过人家就是人品。。。 我这一生中绝对不会交酱的朋友！。。。 其实人际啊！是要handle好来的。。。 我就差了这一点。。。就和别人平衡不到。。。

接下来的人是成绩。。。 我已经非常看破了。。。 我还有1年就完了。。。我不讲毕业。。。因为我已经毕业很久了。。。只是再去念罢了。。。

当什么都做不到时。。。我就是sibeh的很让自己negative 去了。。。。

还好最近交了女朋友。。。 平时心情不好时压力大时都会和她说。。。我觉得她是我最好的听众了。。。不说了。。。blogging 就到个段落。。。 the end¬  

MY MUET IS OVER

Sesi November 2015 I got my 3 papers of my MUET which are the first paper is Reading, follow by Writing then the last paper is Listening.... It was started at 8am until 1pm at DSI Uthm... Reading spent 1.5 hours... Writing spent 1.5 hours too and the Listening only 30 mins.
From here I wont like to express myself... actually I am not fully confident with my muet just now... so here is the rating on the determination difficultIES scale based on my standard:::
REading : 4/10, Writing : 4/10, Listening: 3/10.... and the last time Speaking test my ranking is: 6/10... I got little bit confidence with my speaking... see how?? did I ranking myself was definitely poor right? I was very poor in English dont u see that? less confident then look down myself...
So what? bad English I also can speak, write, listen and read mah?? just our standard is not same...
I try to be your standard but so far I am try best to be your standard... hopefully one day I will stand on beside you!.... I know I was older than you... aged NOT that meant everything... aged is one of a thing based on how old u learn and how old u gained from your life experiences.... dont be proud of yourself and criticise others ppl I will point u "V" or oOo.... KanG! ... your are perfect so what?? need to show off yourself meh? I know I like to compare each other u got seeing right I am blaming ppl that was greater success than me.... My pattern is like this... recently I was nothing to complaint so much... because I am already take it as usual... there is no harm to me anymore... kick your ass off on my head! stop argue with me right now!... I am just doing myself... and confident to my soul...

Last but not least.... My Muet is over... I got a hope to say that wishing my MUET passed.... which is as a requirement to graduate from University... haiyah cukup makan sudah... dont force yourself hardly... life is short... be happy and calm down to prolong your life... I am freaking damn ass hole... just ignore my lousy stupid English... asalkan PAssed Passed! did your hear it!!! haha... no pass then try the second chance lor... 

THE END! 

Time Slow Down 孤单不再是一种滋味

Time Slow Down, and my mood become slower...
孤单不再是一种滋味，而是成为了我一种生活习惯。。。
Loneliness not longer as relish, but its already be part of my life.
最近我好像失恋了。。。
我的日子好无奈。。。没有一场恋爱就算了。。。连一场友谊都没有。。。
25 岁的我。。。 过得好像很狼狈。。。 一直反复着当初的话题。。。
23 岁进了大学会不会后悔？。。。 这只是个人的目标与追求。。。
我会进大学是因为家人的关系。。。我的人很简单。。。没有主张。。。
虽然很努力。。。但是EQ没有人家高。。。 我就是天生的笨！
为什么别人那么聪明。。。一下就明白了。。。我还要想很久？
23 岁进了大学后不但要面对多种的压力也觉得自己很失败。。。
因为自己年龄大的关系却没有领导能力而且成绩没有别人好。。。
除此之外，人际方面也变差了。。。
怕面对。。退缩。。。放弃。。。不想要。。。
就是因为怕被讲。。。羞辱。。。破坏。。。等等。。。
于是我选择了简简单单过日子。。。 虽然朋友不多。。。
没有知己也不用紧。。。但至少有家人的支持。。。
大学的我就是酱的pattern了。。。
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